I just realized today is Monday! With my kids not having school because of Veteran’s day it has felt more like a Saturday.
So, thank you to our veterans. I don’t think there is anything we could ever say that would come close to the gratitude you deserve. Thank you for fighting for our country.
My Dad served two tours in Vietnam. He never talked about it when I was growing up. I just know it was a hard time for him and my mom. I can’t imagine raising babies on my own with my husband in a war. But so many have done it and do it now. My heart goes out to them.
Years ago I went to visit my grandparents. My grandma wasn’t home so I sat and visited with my grandpa. He was always very quiet, my grandma did all the talking, but this time, with just me and him, he opened up. He told me about World War II. He told me how his first assignment out of training was to go to Pearl Harbor and help with clean up. He said it was something nobody, especially a 19 year old boy, should ever have to see. He told me how he was a gunner on a ship. Another ship launched a bomb so close it threw him back against the ship, making him hit his head and giving him injuries that lasted his lifetime. He told me about the men he saw in the water and how there was nothing he could do for them. He told me so much. I had never heard him say so many words. It was my privilege to sit and listen. I’m sure those were memories that he relived the rest of his life. I hope that in sharing with me it gave him a rest from them.
I’m always happy to listen. I have found rest from my struggles when I share them with someone else. I hope that when I listen it gives someone else a much needed rest. So, my friends, if you ever need a listening ear I am here for you. You don’t have to carry it all alone.
P.S. My baby, Calvin, was named after this grandpa!
Lately I’ve been making goals for myself. Some of my goals are big, like publishing a book. Some of my goals are small, like getting dressed for the day. I recently read a book that counseled me to set big goals. The author’s advice was to dream big, write it down, and even find pictures of your goals and hang them up. I didn’t have very many goals so I sat and let my mind wander. I discovered there are a few things in life that I want. I want a clean, organized house. I want a vintage car. I want to help children who have dyslexia. I want to do something great.
That last one hung in the air. It is definitely not a SMART goal, it is not specific in any way. The other goals I can actually set a time frame and make a plan for. Just “doing something great” is too vague, it’s unmeasurable. So I let my mind wander some more. I imagined myself as a nationally known author. I imagined myself graduating college. I imagined the car I will drive to my graduation. I imagined that I felt really great about myself.
And then it hit me. Why do I have to wait to do something great? I published a book. Isn’t that great? I’m going to school. Isn’t that great? I made dinner for my family. Isn’t that great. Why do I have to wait to do something great? The answer is, you don’t. You don’t have to wait.
You can find something great you did in everyday. Whether it’s small, like I brushed my teeth today. Or something bigger, like I surprised my kids with lunch at school (I haven’t done that one yet, but it’s a goal of mine). Or something even bigger like getting that promotion at work (I’m still waiting for that one). What it comes down to is this:
Stop waiting for something great to happen and make great things happen.
Everyday you can do something that is great for that specific day. It might not be grand like the day before. It might be only something you notice. But there is greatness inside of us. Who are we to say we aren’t great? We are. Plain and simple. We are great. And we can make great things happen.
He would have been 48 yesterday. This picture was taken on our last birthday with him. He was so happy. He was in his element, helping all the kids carve their pumpkins. I miss him the most on his birthday. It’s the one day I’m supposed to be able to celebrate his life. We celebrate anyway. We send him balloons every year. The kids look forward to writing a message on their balloon, then letting them go, sending them off to heaven.
Luke had just turned 37 when he died. I will be 37 on my next birthday. I can’t imagine leaving life now. There is too much I want to do, too much I would hate to miss. Man, I miss my brother. As much as I miss him, I have to recognize that he isn’t completely gone. He is my angel, watching over me and my family. I have felt his presence in my life, I know he is near.
I hope you know that you are not alone. I am here for you. I’m cheering you on. I love you.
I’ve got to admit something. The last three or four weeks have been really hard for me to write my usual “how are you Monday”. I’ve been doing this for nearly two years and have found it to be a joy in my life, something I look forward to doing. But the last few weeks I have come close to not writing. Sitting down to do it was heavy, a burden, something I could barely bring myself to do. Honestly, it wasn’t the only thing that was hard for me to do. Living has been hard for me. Trying to do my normal life routine is torture. Getting out of bed in the mornings is nearly impossible, and some days I go straight from my bed to the couch and stay there all day. Doing the most simple things brings on high anxiety. I feel sad and so worthless. There is so much I want to do, and should do, but it just feels impossible.
I’m not saying this for sympathy, I’m just trying to be real. I know each of you have your own struggles. I’m here to remind both of us that it’s ok. It’s going to be ok.
Last week when I was having a particularly hard day a friend told me: “It is incredibly hard, but you ARE doing it. Maybe not how you dreamed you would, but you are!! Believe that… because I believe in you.”
This helped me so much. I’m sharing it in hopes to help you too. Life is hard. But we are stronger than anything that gets thrown our way. We might not get through it the way we would like to, but get through it we will.
Hang in there friends. I’m here with you. We can do hard things!
Hello! How are you today? How are you really doing today? I hope you are well, but more importantly, I hope you can admit how you are really doing. If you’re not doing so red hot I hope you are ok admitting that to yourself. I think it’s so easy to get into the mind set that everything is “fine”, when in reality, things aren’t always fine. Sometimes life really stinks. Sometimes life’s just ok. Sometimes it’s hard. Sometimes it’s great. Whatever life is for you right now, I hope you know you are not alone. Life is just so much better when you can laugh with someone and when you have someone to cry with. Whatever the case is today, please know that I am here with you.
We found snow this weekend! Can you see Lucy’s little snowman? Most of the snow is melted by now, but it sure was beautiful.
There is a quote I have been thinking about.
“Never suppress a generous thought.” Camilla Kimball
I really love this. So many times I will have the thought to call someone or to help a stranger in the store or to do something for someone, but I often push those thoughts aside. Why? Because I think, “Who needs me? I’m sure they are doing just fine. They don’t really need me to send that text or write that email or make that call”.
But the truth of it is, who am I to say what they need or don’t need? I don’t know what anybody else is going through or what kind of day they are having. Hearing from me might be exactly what they need.
We could all use a little more kindness in our lives. Wouldn’t we be happier if we all nurtured kind and generous thoughts? I know I am a happier person when I am thinking kindness rather than putting someone down. So, I am going to try harder to “never suppress a generous thought”.
I love you and hope you know that.
Hello and happy Monday.
I am enjoying a cool, rainy day. It’s such a nice change from our typical hot weather. I’d love to go for a hike or a bike ride or take my kids to the park, but honestly, I don’t have it in me. It is so hard for me to do anything, really. I just want to curl up and not move. I’m trying to figure out why. Fatigue is a constant battle for me, but it’s more than just fatigue. I feel like I’m barely functioning. Not sure what to do about that. I guess just keep trying.
To everyone who is struggling, hang in there. Don’t give up. Keep trying. Keep going. Keep moving.
I try so hard to tell myself this. I try so hard to push myself on. Sometimes it works and sometimes it doesn’t. At least I’m trying.
Hang in there, friend. Life can be hard but you are strong. I am strong. We are stronger than we think.
Please, have a good week. Try to find the good, and find someone to do something for.